If ever there has been a time to not wait for the storm to pass, and instead dance when it rains, it has been 2020! I started to write a long Facebook post, and decided instead to resurrect my blog! So here goes.

As a teacher and a mom of four this school year has been hard. That is an understatement…it has been brutal. The last few days (who am I kidding, every day since the start of the school year) I have come home from work feeling a bit defeated and totally exhausted. Having to teach in a whole new way and managing my own kiddos on their remote days it is all too much at times. And I have to say I am one of the lucky moms. My husband does most of the heavy lifting when it comes to our kids since he is teaching from home. (Honestly, I don’t know how he does it) I’m not sure how single parent households or homes with two parents that work each day are surviving.

All of it makes me feel like a hamster on a wheel, a hamster with weak legs, a wheel that is wobbly and rusty and hard to move! It isn’t pretty.

But then I went to my cardio kick class and got my butt kicked for an hour. Like every class I attend I was pretty much out of my comfort zone the entire time. My face turns into a tomato in the first five minutes of class. There are large mirrors lining the whole front of the room so I have to look at myself struggle for an hour! And tonight we jumped rope, and if you are a mom or a woman of a certain age you know what that means ;). But I loved it the whole time (okay maybe not the 7 jump rope songs). It was exactly what I needed.

I went to class exhausted, overwhelmed, done. I drove home equally exhausted but in a whole new way. I was invigorated.

By the time I pulled into my driveway I had a whole new perspective on this “new normal” of school while in a pandemic.

I started thinking about all the challenges we have all had to overcome and adapt to, often with little to no notice. I thought about how all of this has pushed me way outside my comfort zone. I realized that part of my defeatist attitude stems from spending my previous years teaching in that comfort zone. I was in the groove, I could coast on days where I felt tired, or overwhelmed at home. I could fall back on doing what I have always done and walk out of school at the end of the day feeling like a success.

I realized that this year there are no comfort zones, no days (or even moments) to simply coast. School is hard. “Homeschooling” kids at home is hard. Balancing it all is hard. And I have done none of it before. Which makes it all harder.

And all of this comfort zone thinking made me think about my workout class. Tonight I did countless push-ups (on my knees but they still count); some on my knuckles, some with my hands wrapped around weights, and even some on my finger tips. Not one push up was easy or comfortable. But I did them, and I am proud that I dug deep and pushed myself! So I took that pride I felt about my push ups and put it into this difficult year.

Because here is the thing… When we leave our comfort zones, whether by choice like my cardio kick class, or by force, like this Covid mess, we do amazing things. One of the most amazing things that happens is that without our comfy boxes we are normally working in we are forced to tap into our creativity, to reach beyond what we think we can handle and produce more, and think outside the box.

I found myself reflecting on everything I have seen from teachers and parents who are operating far from their normal comfortable boxes…

My kids at home span an elementary, a middle and high school. And I have seen creativity abound at each level.

In Biology the teacher is using face time to get the kids at home that day “in her classroom”.

In Algebra 1 my high schooler has a packet so well written and organized and it also includes online videos to match each day.

My middle schooler has a math teacher that has an interactive color coded chart telling each student how they are doing on their remote math lessons. They drive their own success and track their progress by the color she gives them on each lesson.

The middle school string teacher does her viola lessons virtually and has an app that scores my daughter’s progress on songs to hep her grow.

My third graders have virtual vision therapy, schedules they can manage themselves and can navigate their Google Classrooms like pros because of how wonderfully their teachers have set them up.

My husband and his colleagues are constantly searching for the best way to reach their fully remote high school kids and teach automotive at the same time. They embrace new technology and interactive lessons and sit on zoom calls all day keeping kids actively engaged.

I have colleagues that are also learning new technology by the minute in search of the best way to engage kids.

One colleague set up editing partners for her writers. When the kids are at home they can virtually work together to help each other to become better writers.

So many of my colleagues went from never using Google Classrooms to now managing eight classes at a time. All while taking the learning curve in stride.

I have collaborated more with my peers at school than I ever have in the past. And because of this I am a better teacher.

I’ve talked to parents that feel like they are drowning but then show me amazing, brightly colored schedules they’ve created to keep their kids on track on remote days. Who then go on to explain how they set up Alexa to remind her kiddos to log in to their Google Meets or complete tasks.

Many of my friends have posted their “learning zones” they created with their kids at home. They share all the ways they have tried to help their kids adjust and be successful while learning from home.

I haven’t talked to one teacher or parent of a school age child that said any of this was easy. But all of the things we have created and done so far, while tiring for us, is so amazing! There have been so many creative solutions to problems we couldn’t even imagine last year. It all leaves me I am in awe of all we can do.

When I am in the right state of mind (and this is key), this is what I see. I see the ways we have changed and broken from the old, comfortable ways we developed when life was easy. I see how much we can do, and how amazing we can be.

So the reality is this: Yes, this is hard. And yes, most days I feel like I am not doing anything super well and I’m not nailing much. But that is okay. Anytime you leave your comfort zone it feels awkward, you are bound to stumble, and there will be many days you feel far from an expert. And all of that is not only expected but should be welcomed. This is when we grow the most. We are all doing something that is hard, something new and sometimes scary. This is when creativity thrives. What I am doing is my best. What we all are doing is amazing. When we look back at this time I hope we look back feeling proud.

Once my legs finally loosened up enough so I could climb out of my SUV I walked into my house realizing that I am not longing for how things used to be. I hope that when this is all over we don’t just return to normal. I hope that we hold on to some of the new and creative ways we have discovered to meet kids where they are, to teach them in more engaging ways and to inspire them to own their own education.

It doesn’t look like this Covid storm is leaving anytime soon. So I am going to try my best to focus on the dancing in the rain. I’m going to keep my eyes open for the amazingly creative things that are blooming all around me as the rain pours down. I can’t do anything about the storm. I have to step outside my box and let the wind blow and the rain fall.

So let’s hope we don’t just return to how things were when this storm passes. Let’s hope that we hold on to our creativity, our problem solving and all the other positive things that have come from leaving our comfort zones.